So here is goes.
It's really fucking annoying to hear you talk all the innocuous "good" ways your new diet has made you feel. I am all for eating healthy and finding balance but when I hear you announce that you are suddenly gluten sensitive or on a raw foods juicing diet I just assume that you are looking for a socially acceptable way to go on a freaky diet and lose weight. While I want to support you and every person's search for better health and happiness my sister has a real gluten intolerance, celiac disease, and I have watched her run from many a meal to vomit in the bathroom because a careless restaurant put croutons in her salad by accident and then just took them out before serving her - the mere crumbs making her violently ill for weeks. Her illness makes even the smallest cross contamination (using the same wooden spoon - though washed, or sharing a toaster etc) cause havoc on her body. Nutritional deficiency, vomiting, elevated inflammation markers, real stuff. You may very well feel better when you cut out certain foods but don't pretend it's the same as a disease.
I am lactose intolerant. When I eat dairy, I "suffer" like you.
But I also have lesions on my brain. These are very different things.
While you drone on about how different and how much healthier you feel now that you eat a raw diet all I can think is "you are healthy". That is the point. You can experiment with illness because it's not yours. Meanwhile I am wondering how I will get through 3 years of law school when I have periods of hours when the vision in my right eye because a lacy double shadow outline.
You might feel you run further now with less pain in your joints but there are some days that I can't even walk up stairs, or get into my bathroom without a crutch and it has nothing to do with what I ate.
I have lesions on my brain.
And I believe in natural anti-inflammatories, I take cherry juice and tumeric pills. I do acupuncture and meditation for pain relief. I believe in all the avenues but I am so tired of listening to everyone turn their spiritual and personal explorations into diseases tied up with cures.
Instead I wish that people could appreciate all that their bodies do for them every day. The ways that our heart speeds up when our lungs slow down. The intricate dance of heart rate and blood pressure that keeps us steady every time we stand up. The ease in which some of you can walk across a street or up a mountain.
Because those are things my body doesn't always do. And I marvel at how well my body compensates. How truly amazing the biology of our beings is. Some days I sit at a traffic light and try to think back to before my accident, before I lost my mobility and I try to remember how it felt to just be able to walk. No limp, no pain, no crutch. How free I must have felt. How small the world must have been. How open a future when all there was to think about was what next.
Now as I pack my inhalers and hand braces I try to really appreciate all the ways my body still works for me. To appreciate how it has managed to compensate for the things at which it fails. I try to listen to my body and give it what it needs. A long bath. A quiet hour. A steak.
And maybe you could too. Because one day you will have to face an injury or illness. Real illness. The kind they call "traumatic" or "devastating" or "progressive". And you will lose things but gain things too. And you will hate the people around you telling you that if you only ate a goji berry....
And to live this life with illness you have to practice a kind of grace and acceptance that few others will give back to you. The win is the day to day. The getting up. The letting go.
So eat your juice dinner or your "gluten free" meal (which even the menu/label concludes is not actually gluten/contamination free which is why its safe for you but not my sister) but acknowledge you are doing it to feel BETTER than you already do. Appreciate the health you have. Realize it's not forever.