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i woke up pissed. i hardly slept last night because i was so sick to my stomach i wanted to shoot myself in the face. now this is just an expression. but really if you could do one thing for me, one thing, i wouldn't even ask you to save my leg. fuck. i would just ask you to fix my belly. and these things go.

yeah i woke up pissed. just because. just because.

my respite it over. i am tired. there are belongings to be divided. i will miss the things i am giving up for real happiness. things like having someone who will do it for it no matter what. or someone to kick when you are down.

'cause i want to kick something. i want to hit something. i want to fuck it up and leave it broken.

or i already did. or i don't care what you think about me.

or how about some days, some mornings, some times i am sick of my body and the ways it reminds me of that day. or how about some mornings i want you to fix me and when you don't i hate you too. or how about some days i just don't care how i sound to you.