i sat on the floor in a tiny little gallery space to listen to one of joe's friends bands that i really like and remembered for the first time in a while that i am not like everyone. you know, the bad leg thing. the handicap. nerve damage and love are forever. and after five songs sitting on that pile of scar tissue i have instead of an ass my entire leg was shaking and it felt like a hundred bats were flying around inside me and i could barely walk to the car and it's funny really how i could spent five years on crutches and then wake up one morning and forget it was ever any other way and last night i couldn't sleep because of the lightning strikes that shook down my entire leg right into my pinky toe and this is what the living means and this is how recovery is forever and watch me run but that night will always trip me up because it lives inside me like ivan's laugh and the smell of the ocean.
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