around the way girl

who says you can't escape. who says a change of space won't help you breath. who says dreams don't come true.

i am closing the gap. i am embracing my romantic notions. i am filling in oceans with postcards and plane rides. i am handing back my tether, i am handing over my what-ifs. i am learning to more than survive. i believe in this.

i am leaving for paris & travels in spain in two and a half weeks. it's close enough finally to feel real. to picture the hotel beds, to taste the food, to feel the air. i can't wait to just be away. to just breath. to walk streets that don't even know me. to drink, to eat, to dance. to sleep through the night. to wake up rested. to laugh. ohmygod. you wouldn't believe how we laugh. you wouldn't believe how light i feel when we do. you wouldn't believe how it makes me feel/reel/revel. and it will be just enough. just right. just.

and this time i am running towards something. i am not running away. i am not holding vigil. i am not waiting for the shoe to drop. and all i want is to journey. all i want is this journey. all i want is this chance. this hope. this feeling i have like no matter what happens, no matter who stays, i am going to be okay. it is all okay. and there is nothing to be afraid of. nothing i want to get away from. nothing to run away from. anymore.